urbanter

Student blog of the Stanford University Urban Studies Department

the beginning of farewell

Last week, I said goodbye to the brightest stars in my orbit after an immensely successful final week of class, against all odds! We had a huge set back early in the week. On our way up to the Bronx on Tuesday, Christy and I got a text from the teaching artist, Christina, that she left her purse containing the class hard drive with all of the interviews, materials, and animations…. on the train. Stress is an understatement.

The purse has yet to return, so we had to figure out how to work with what we had. We have audio from all of the interviews, some photos, and video from 2 of the interviews. So from there, Christina managed to come up with a plan to have the students produce all the art that we would need for the lapse in video. It was a really ambitious plan, but she organized the days really well and they got through all of the content!

This week I really started to see some of the compromises in learning that the CUP model necessitates. In exchange for a really polished, reusable product, the teaching artist has to take a really strong vision in the last stages of the project. There’s just not enough time in the projects to walk students through the process of writing a script and brainstorming ideas for what to film and create. They needed every last second to create the art that we needed for the video. I have no doubt that with a lot more time, they could have come up with awesome ideas to bring the information we gathered to life. Unfortunately, funding is already tight and extending the time means using more money.

This is going to be a problem in my project as well, I already know. Luckily, my overhead is a lot lower than CUP’s, since I don’t need to pay anyone. But I will be battling time, since Courtney, my host teacher, has a lot that she needs to cover in her curriculum. I can see a lot of the work that I’ll be doing between sessions as interpreting and packaging the generated materials to help students internalize the information during the time we have together. I guess my battle in the next few weeks of curriculum development/revision will be to pin-point what the most important learning goal is for the project so that I can make sure I’m trimming the right fat out of the process.

I’m going to save the sappy end-of-internship post for next week, after I’ve left New York and feel at my most intensely nostalgic. So be ready!

In the meantime, here are some excerpts from my snapchat story from the last few days of class. See you next time!

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last day selfie!

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hooray for civic engagement day!

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my favorite doodle from the class… transit tales featuring the bean bag people.

a mish-mash of feels & happenings

I turned 21 last week! It’s a weird thing to have a landmark birthday thousands of miles away from the majority of people who care about you, but it makes it easy for me to see the people in my life that are truly the realest. I’m always humbled and thankful for the immense amounts of love that I have in my life.

Things with my project have been slowly but steadily creeping forward. I finally(!!!!) nailed down a teacher that is willing to host me in their classroom, which was a huge relief for me. I’ll be in a World History class with 10th graders, which is already changing my plans quite a bit. Learning about the actual history of the world changed my life and my mind has been buzzing with all of the ways we’ll be able to teach and learn and collaborate this upcoming fall.

I’ve been sitting in on out-of-classroom meetings and curriculum development sessions with Christy and Christina, the teaching artist for the Bronx, and just observing has been really helpful in thinking about what works and what doesn’t. One thing that Christy repeats over and over again is that you only have students’ attention for at maximum 2 minutes of straight talking. Lecturing and powerpointing at high school students is completely ineffective, unless it’s done in an intentionally collaborative manner. And you have to be REALLY, really clear with instruction. It’s a really powerful intention to want to co-create knowledge with the students, but as the teacher, you still need to have structures so that we all know where we’re headed. More importantly, so that at the very end of all the activities, students are receiving both the knowledge that they uncovered, and the knowledge that will help them better critically acknowledge their world.

It’s a hard line to walk. How much direction is too much? Watching Christina teach has been great because she’s not an expert, so I can see where things can change or be more or less collaborative in any given moment. But she’s also brilliant! Her activities are really creative and innovative, and push my limits of what I think our students are capable of.

Last thing: I’ve been thinking a lot about what it’s going to be like coming back to Palo Alto. It kind of makes me want to throw up.

Stanford has afforded me so, so many blessings. The best friends I’ve ever made, life lessons, school lessons, mentors, perspective, this internship, my health, food and shelter for the last three years of my life – I will always owe a debt to my university.

But Palo Alto has never been my heart’s home. When I’m at school, I drive off campus almost every weekend in search of new dumplings, people whose accomplishments don’t come with a piece of paper to validate them, the thick mixture of accents of all kinds that echo through the memories of my childhood. New York, for all of the things that I love and absolutely can’t stand about this place, has pulled me a little closer to the place that I think I’m looking for – and in turn, has pulled my heart even further away from the alienating perfection of the bubble.

I’ve been doing a really weird dual-feeling countdown. Three weeks left until I reunite with my family, my friends, and my boyfriend, all of whom I miss very dearly. Three weeks left in this perplexing, magical, and altogether overwhelming place. That weird mix of savoring every day, while also willing them to pass… bittersweet at its finest.

Til next time, when I’m sure my nostalgia for my New York will begin to start hitting me before I’ve even left.

adulting sans profit

This past weekend, I did something pretty out of character. I found myself in a eucalyptus-scented room heated to 95 degrees with 30 other people bending myself into weird positions and wondering about all the choices I made that brought me to this place. Yep. Hot yoga. I was there on a free trial, but the other poor souls in the room had each forked out $22 for the class. While I was signing up for the class, I immediately ran through all of the things that I could do with the $66 per week that these people spend to sweat (and like, for their health and stuff).

I could have 4 dinners out in New York. Probably 5 in Las Vegas. 3 in Palo Alto. I could buy a one-way ticket from San Francisco to Las Vegas to see my family. I could buy 4 awesome dresses or two pairs of shoes that I would wear until they were threadbare.

And those are the luxury things – as for my necessities… that’s two days of rent at my current apartment. That’s my entire car insurance payment. 10 trips by car to Independence High School to teach. 33 trips on the subway. 1.5 weeks worth of groceries to feed myself.

But I really liked the hot yoga class. It made me feel refreshed, centered in my body, and clear-headed for the first time in months. I seriously hate exercising, but this class was a revelation.

Now, back to the internship: in the office, there are some jokes about how little non-profit life pays, the high rate of turnover and career changes, and how the only way people can hack it is if they’re really, really passionate… or they have a sugar daddy.

Here comes the point: I work at a non-profit. I’m probably going to work at non-profits for a large portion of my career. That’s the unpleasantly too-true description of my reality.

For a long time, I joked about how I was always going to be poor and I was okay with that. I’ve got more than my fair share of anti-capitalist sentiments, and I kind of felt like being successful but poor was going to be my lifelong F U to the system.

My revelation this week was that I am a selfish, ridiculous child and it’s time for a new plan. Am I going to subject my children to poverty so that I can have my untarnished moral high horse? Am I going to be that woman who relies on their partner to do the dirty work of being financially successful so I can pretend like I’m above it? Am I going to pretend like that view is going to work for more than the first five years out of college, and like it’s not going to end up with me inevitably “selling out” into a higher paying career, where I can afford to take hot yoga classes AND eat dinner?

That’s not the person I want to be. I want to work to help show people that this is not martyr work. It’s not the extra stuff. It’s absolutely essential and it should be a sustainable career path for those who want to give their lives to service. So… this week, I’ll be looking into non-exploitative paths for personal finance and find out how to make the absolute most of my meager resources. I’m going to find the most compassionate pathway through our capitalistic reality so that I can spend my life working all the while towards something better.

Oh yeah, and I’m signing up for a hot yoga studio in Brooklyn. It’s kind of a revolutionary act in context, right?

measuring genius

Thanks for all the love on my last blog post! I don’t think I really fully stated my views, but that was a bit of catharsis that I definitely needed to start moving forward with my project. And, ironically, last week, I started assisting in the Bronx with our Urban Investigation. Christina, the teaching artist, is really awesome. She’s so different from the students, is probably the most amazing thing to me. Oftentimes, I think of teachers needing to relate. Christina has a background in fine art and performance art – she has a billion degrees and is off to Harvard to get another one in the fall. She’s both academic and artistic, and that blends to be a presence that is pretty different than our vivacious students. However, I feel like contrary to pushing them away, the contrast between them draws the students in. It’s been great to work with her.

Speaking of the students: they are truly, truly incredible. They are lively, engaged, hilarious, and outrageously creative. They are amazingly critical thinkers and leaders. I honestly think they are the most intelligent group of high school students I have ever worked with. And you know what? They all live in the Bronx. Some of them immigrated to the United States as recently as 2 months ago. Many of them are English Language Learners. And wow, are they incredible. In the past week, I have watched them create storyboards, produce a stop motion animation, conduct and film a professional interview, ask critical questions about race and inequality, and endlessly surprise the whole teaching team with new ideas and perspectives.

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editing their animation together on premiere.

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christina helping a group with steadying the camera.

kacey, daryl, and javi shooting their penguin transit puppet stop motion animation!

kacey, daryl, and javi shooting their penguin transit puppet stop motion animation!

We went on a field trip to Grand Central station on the third day of class. We barely even had to supervise them in Grand Central. Every group was on task, got through their visual scavenger hunt, and was back in our designated meeting spot right on time at 11:45am. This never happens. Students are never all back in the meeting spot on time. And yet, here they were!

On the train ride back, I had a lengthy conversation about inequality and success with two of the students, Deanna and Kacey. I was barely doing any educating. When Deanna mentioned that “successful” people were more capable of taking means of transport other than the subway, the thought had barely entered my mind to ask her to think more on her definition of “successful” when Kacey piped in to do just that and push back on societal standards of success. Like, what? It took me until my sophomore year of college to really start vigorously questioning my environment in the way that obviously has come so naturally to them out of their circumstance.

I find myself coming back to question the ways in which we measure the “achievement gap”. Before this summer, I often found myself still falling back into this type of deficit mindset often – seeking the ways in which students are underperforming to the standards. It is in those moments that I felt most uncomfortable at Stanford. Because at Stanford, I am shown statistics and pictures and graphs about how students of color are failing in every single one of my classes, every day, I have a moment where I think about how I can change them to better fit what these old folks want out of them.

One of my goals was to abandon this deficit mindset for good, and I think that my students in the Bronx have been essential in helping me do that. I know that when I am with my students, I do not see their failures. I do not see low test scores and the ways in which they are eternally not performing white enough. I see their triumphs and their resilience. I see the incredible amount of love and care in their homes, and the inhuman amount of work that their parents and other loving adult figures do to provide enough for them to succeed.

With my next three weeks with them, I can only hope I to give them even a fraction of the perspective that they have given me.

the jury is out (and they ain’t coming back)

As I mentioned in my bio & post from a few weeks ago, I’m working on my senior capstone project for Urban Studies concurrently with my internship at CUP. Here’s the abstract for my project so you can get a handle on the topic:

Monument to Change is a community-based project that seeks to empower youth through hands-on engagement in the investigation of their communities. The intended learning outcome of this project is to empower youth with the knowledge of how to create change in their communities through participation in the civic process. To accomplish this, students will investigate a mode of change and historically how change has been made and continues to be made in their spaces (both figuratively and literally), whether that be a neighborhood, their school, or more widely in their city.

After a few weeks of working on these projects, I’ve had to start thinking about my fundamental goals for the project and how my project differs structurally and idealistically from the CUP model.

At CUP, the teaching artists do most of the teaching on youth ed projects. The benefits of having an artist as a central part of the project is clear in the beautiful and amazingly educative materials that are produced through CUP projects. These tools make sure that the information lives on as a resource for students and teachers.

TA dillon & students from ichs on set of Now Boarding!

Some of these artists come into the program with teaching experience and that’s preferred, but some of them don’t have any teaching experience. I would pile myself into this category of untrained or informally trained educator, since I have not gone through a teacher training program. Because of this, the process of curriculum design and revision is pretty intense, and most of the revision is done by CUP staff. Christy, the Youth Ed program director, taught art for 10 years at a public high school, and is absolutely incredible. Her edits on the curriculum are invaluable, and her feedback to teaching artists after observation is truly transformative on their teaching. Urban Investigations are primarily after-school programs and the work is more centered on creativity and observation than critical content research. Because of this, paired with the strong mentorship and feedback mechanisms from CUP, I think that the use of a non-teacher educator works well in this context.

For my project, I’ll be teaching in a classroom during the normal school day, as part of a required academic class. My curriculum is based in a lot of critical content research and texts. And recently, I had to confront that some of the mechanisms for feedback and co-creation of curriculum that I had tried to establish at the onset of my project were now falling through. Now, that is an entirely different monumental can of worms.

There are some pretty strong views about classroom teachers in this country. There’s this widespread narrative that our teachers are failing our children in America. Many people who have watched Waiting for Superman think that our school system is failing because of the tenure system, and that the solution is to fire 80% of the ‘underperforming’ teacher workforce and hire new educators. Some people say that we should fill these vacancies via the Teach for America model, which says that with a strong undergraduate education, a few weeks of training, and bright youthful energy, you too(!) can be a great teacher. (Are my politics showing yet?) There’s an overwhelming narrative that teaching is something that anyone can do.

To me, herein lies the problem. Great teachers and those on track to become great teachers, have years of specialized training and education on teaching. They learn the complete pedagogy of teaching in their subject area – the ins and outs of what educative activities look like, fair assessments, how to structure a lesson plan, how to lead a discussion… the more I learn about teaching, the more amazed I am that I have had teachers who make it look effortless. They have a unique and specialized skill set, in the same way that other professionals do. Not just anyone can teach.

To put this in context, would someone let me function as a pediatrician before attending med school? Would I be able to practice law without passing the bar? And yet, I am let in front of our most malleable minds, to teach them how to see and exert their presence in the world, with basically no credential at all. In fact, people often applaud me for this act.

I am guilty. So why did I even embark on this whole thing in the first place?

I often call myself an ~educator~ in a really nebulous way when probed. Really, that’s my way of saying i have no idea what i’m doing but i guess i’m doing it anyway. It’s my way of dodging the question about what my presence as a 20-year-old-with-no-teaching-credential means when I’m in front of a classroom. For those of you tapping your chins, don’t worry – I, too, call this hypocrisy.

Here is my truth: we have textbooks that fail to illustrate the immigrant experience, that hide injustices under rhetoric of democracy, and conveniently leave out the ways in which the struggle is still ongoing, the ways in which the history in the text has shaped the experience of those reading it. If there is failure in our system, it is with standards of success that are rooted in systems of oppression and too often fail to prompt meaningful civic engagement in students after they leave school.

Justice. Empowerment. Resistance. Those are the values at the root of my project and at the root of what I believe makes an education go from useful to transformative. My students deserve to know how to stand up for themselves when they are denied their rights. They deserve to feel like they matter in the eyes of their government. Above all, my students deserve to know how to seek justice for themselves.

Despite how much I have thought through my impact, I understand that I still may do more harm than good. But so many teachers are overworked and underpaid. They have a million people to please, between parents, administration, and the ever critical public. Must they bear the complete burden of this as well? Maybe it’s my place to be the outsider who focuses on this issue and pushes, just a little bit, because I have been afforded the privilege to do so.

I don’t really know. The jury might always be out.

In the meantime, I’ll get to work.

Center for Urban Pedagogy – Week 2

This week was a sort of calm before I dive into my main project for the summer, the Bronx Urban Investigation. It is set to launch on July 6th, so last week was a lull in activity while previous programs wrapped up. I got to do some design work this week, which is always really fun. Also, Deland, our fellowship coordinator, came to the CUP office for a visit this week! Thanks so much for taking time out of your trip to come and see what we’re up to, Deland.

Deland, Sandy, and I at the CUP office!

Deland, Sandy, and I at the CUP office!

I spent most of this week supporting Jenn, our Youth Ed program assistant, on the currently active City Studies. City Studies are another program under the Youth Education umbrella of CUP; they’re usually based in classrooms and focus on simplifying and making a dense classroom topic more accessible. The art deliverable produced at the end of the program then lives on and the teacher can use it to help future classes understand the topic. They involve less contact hours with students than Urban Investigations and are generally a little less in-depth because of that.

The City Study I was helping with was a partnership with the Bronx Museum. They are doing a three-part series on asthma in the Bronx. In the South Bronx, 17.3 out of 1000 people are hospitalized for asthma every year, which is about 8x the national average. The rate of incidence for asthma in children is 8.3% which is double the national average. These rates of asthma stem from two main issues: the concentration of trucking and a lack of enforcement for landlords to uphold humane, healthy living conditions for their tenants. In many old homes in the Bronx, there is mold, peeling paint, pesticides, and other chemicals that can severely exacerbate asthma symptoms and lead to hospitalization, and in some cases, death due to asthma attack. Most people don’t know that these issues in their homes are connected to asthma.

A visualization of community survey responses, conducted and created by the teens of the Bronx Museum program.

As an activist, I am constantly striving to understand more deeply the impact of injustice, to better be able to advocate for solutions that will actually make a difference. I came into my internship at CUP after a really hard year at Stanford, politically speaking. I left the year feeling loaded down by really heavy, toxic rhetoric with no idea of how to move toward solutions. I forgot what it was like to do work that was positive, purposeful, and driven towards change.

At CUP, I’m beginning to find my way back to that path. It’s been rejuvenating for my spirit as both an educator and activist to see the concrete ways in which education gives power back to disenfranchised people. When students learn about asthma with the Bronx museum, they go home and can find the triggers in their own home and tell their friends. That knowledge could quite literally decrease the number of hospitalizations due to asthma in their circle – and the best part is that the knowledge never expires. It’s sustainable and naturally reproduces. It’s justice in a very real way.

CUP's Who We Are Collage

CUP’s Who We Are Collage. Try to find me! 🙂

To close: this week, I added myself into CUP’s Who We Are collage. At the end of week 2, I’m feeling so honored to be in the silly, off-beat company of so many truly gifted artists, educators, and designers who are teaching me every day what justice looks like, both literally and figuratively.

Center for Urban Pedagogy (CUP): Week 1

Hello from Brooklyn!

My name is Jazlyn & I’m spending my summer at the Center for Urban Pedagogy. You can learn more about me and my organization here! I’ve been here for about a week and it has been quite the wild ride so far. New York City is no joke, and I am slowly developing the quad muscles to prove it.

I have done and learned an incredible amount in the four days that I’ve spent at CUP. I want to share with you all some of the main takeaways that I’ve been mulling over this week.

1) The Power of (Un)Education

The project that I’ll be working on this summer is part of CUP’s Youth Education arm. The programs are called Urban Investigations and the one that CUP is hosting in the summer will be a collaboration between 5 high schools in the Bronx. Urban Investigations are project-based curricula – check out the process in the infographic below.

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How Urban Investigations Work

Our big question for the Bronx UI is, “Why do subways cost what they do? Who decides?” As an Urban Studies major, I heard the topic and I was like, great! Transit! We constantly learn about transit and how it works – I thought I would have a lot to contribute.

However, as I began to do my background reading, and as I began to live in New York, I came to realize how absolutely wrong that was. The New York Subway System is a behemoth of its own, and no amount of knowledge about any other transit system could have prepared me to know the intense amount of politics, money, and social dynamics that go into shaping and maintaining the subway. For instance, did you know that people who ride the subway are colloquially called straphangers? I read an entire article thinking that straphangers was some sort of derogatory term before I asked someone in the office to explain it to me.

As I dove into that research, I was so enraptured by the richness of the topic and complexity of the answer. I began to remember how amazing it is not to know stuff, both as a person and an educator. I expressed this to our director of Youth Ed, Christy, and she said, “That’s the great thing about Urban Investigations. When we pick a topic, we usually don’t know all that much about it, so we’re learning with the students as they investigate.”

For the students, that is such a powerful thing. They will have educators that are relying on them to provide essential components to the project. Without them, we wouldn’t have the answer to our question. That truly, there is no right answer – what they find is our collective truth.

2) Reciprocity

That last note feeds into my next point, which is cultivating reciprocity in service. Reciprocity is a bit of a buzzword in service – it’s something that sounds good and is actually essential to effective service, but in practice is incredibly hard to carry out in a meaningful way. Out of the 3 quarter-long service experiences that I have had in the past year, I don’t know if I successfully implemented it in any of those projects. It was a pretty elusive concept.

That is, until I arrived at CUP. I have seen this in two ways since arriving. On one side, is the reciprocity embedded in their own programming. The UI projects have an incredible amount of reciprocity between the students and their teachers, because they are co-creating knowledge. As I elaborated on above, CUP educators are not experts in every topic that they propose. In fact, a lot of the projects are specific to students’ community context and so often, students have a lot more experiential knowledge about topics than their teachers.

In my personal context, I had an incredible meeting with Christy about what my experience this summer is going to look like. She showed so much care and depth of thought about how my priorities could intersect with needs at CUP, and particularly, the needs that they will have on-site at the Bronx. For instance, one of my priorities is to get hands-on experience with the UI because I will be developing a similar curriculum later for my Urban Studies capstone project this summer. We talked about where my project intersects with Urban Investigations, and what days would be mutually beneficial for me to be on-site. For example, I will be on-site when the students conduct interviews on the street. I will get to see how to teach interview basics and see the activity in action – and I also need to be there to supervise a group so that we can split up. Reciprocity!

That’s it for now – what an amazing week to start off this summer of advocacy, justice, and growth!